Let’s Go Out
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Date Night: those two words bring a smile to my face.
It means that my wife, Alisa, and I get to go out without the kids. Dinner, uninterrupted conversation, and then a walk, drive, or movie at home. If you’re like us you probably spend a lot of time going back and forth trying to figure out where to eat and what to do so much so that the joy of a date night is lost.
It took us awhile but we realized that we needed something different and implemented “Take the Lead” on our date nights. It’s not difficult-it just means that either Alisa or I plan out the entire date night. When you Take the Lead you release your spouse from having to decide anything, it becomes an opportunity for them to just be spoiled by you. This becomes such a welcome change because, let’s face it, both husbands and wives are constantly making decisions all day long, we become mentally exhausted. Taking the Lead is a throw back to the early days of your relationship when one of you would plan a romantic evening, down to the very last detail…just because!
Here are some ideas to help you Take the Lead on your next date night:
• Choose the restaurant and make reservations
• If you know what your spouse likes preorder and have appetizers or dinner ready when you arrive
• Plan the date’s activity-a movie, a walk in the park, a drive
Things you can do on a date night:
1. Museum/Gallery
2. Zoo/Wild Animal Park
3. Lunch/dinner at a park
4. Long drives
5. Walking on the beach
6. Hiking/backpacking together
7. Sit by a lake, a pond, a creek
8. Playing a board game together
9. Watch a movie
10. Think outside the box
Date night is a special time for the two of you to reconnect, to focus on your relationship. Remember that you should never stop courting your spouse, wooing them, making them feel special. Take the Lead and be in the moment with the most special person in your life.
Last Weeks Love Every Day Contributor: Make sure to check out last weeks post, Pillow Talk: Romance Through Words at Engaged Marriage.
Next Weeks Love Every Day Contributor: Don’t forget to check out, Putting the Kids to Bed: Balancing Kids Needs and Adult Time at Affair Care.
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I agree, having a regular (or semi-regular) date night is important. It is easy, however, to fall into a routine. I like your idea about taking turns to “take the lead.”
I don't normally recommend movies because people's taste are just too varied. But I will suggest you go see the recently released “Date Night” movie. It is a little far-fetched, but it is also thought-provoking on several levels. I blogged about it recently here: http://surrenderedmarriage.blogspot.com/2010/04…
I'm wondering if anyone else shares my perspective on the marriage lessons from this movie.
Scott – Having worked with many couples the routine date night is something that irritates both of them. To tell you the truth it irritated Alisa and I as well and that is why we came up with “Take the Lead”. We talk in depth about this in our upcoming book Stripped Down, but I will have to say it has made a huge difference in our date nights. Now, instead of the “what do you want to do for date night”, one of us plans it and we go and enjoy it.
I haven't seen the movie Date Night, but it is one that we do want to see.
Thanks for your comment. It's appreciated.
Just found your blog & website….Great Stuff!! I am going to continue exploring it!! This post caught my eye because my friends and I recently started up a blog to help US with continuing to date our spouses. We take turns posting the creative dates we come up with and take our spouses on. It has been SUCH a blast and all of our marriages have been even more enhanced. Come check us out if you are ever wondering what to do for a date night.
Anyway…I am off to continue exploring your blog!
Tara – I love the site that you and your girlfriends have out there. What a wonderful way to encourage each other and other couples to get out for date nights. In our time talking and leading small groups I will have to say that this is one area that many couples struggle with. It's as if once we get married we can't do anything fun and different any longer. Your posts are great and I'll make sure to pass on your site.
Thanks for checking out our site.